2010: In two years we all die

Since we all die in 2012, I wonder what excitement the next two years will bring? Personally, I don't believe in the whole 2012 hubbub. But I do believe that such hubbub will cause a great many people to panic. And in that panic will come some sort of temporary Apocalypse.

I'm all for it. That's how I roll. I'm a total cynic. I figure that since I spend a good majority of my time bitching and moaning, why not root for those crackpots and severely religious types to bring chaos and destruction, right? SURE! If there is anything I can do to help, let me know. Especially if it involves some sort of looting, pillaging and robbing those far more wealthier than I.

I realize that I could do any or all of that now but then it would involve jail time. And I don't want to be spending my last two years in the joint while others are out preparing for (and causing) the event known as 2012.

Is there anyway we can start the 2012 crisis now? I'm pretty impatient and would like some freakish events to come our way now. Oh wait, there is one thing that has come our way that is the beginning of 2012...

... H1N1.

Swine flu.

Or, as it originally became to be known, the Mexican Flu.

I was telling my boss at work a couple of days ago that I can't believe the amount of fervor over the swine flu and the vaccination for it. I suppose that if I had children, this wouldn't be so damn funny to me. But, I have to admit, that I think this whole thing is just damn silly.

But the more I think about it, the more I feel that there is something more to the H1N1 virus. And I wonder how many other people feel as I do? Last Sunday, "60 Minutes" did a follow-up report on a story they did regarding the swine flu.

The report was particularly interesting to me because they investigated more into how the vaccine is made. There is only ONE company that produces this vaccine in the United States. It's a French drug company. They have a THREE BILLION DOLLAR federal contract with the United States government to produce the H1N1 vaccine. Here is an excerpt from the 60 Minutes story by Scott Pelley:

Last summer, the government said there would be 120 million doses of vaccine by fall; weeks later, it revised that to 40 million. Now, just over 17 million have shipped - 14 percent of the first estimate.

Experts agree the government decoded the virus to prepare a vaccine in record time, a real achievement. But then the project hit snags.

The vaccine took longer than expected to produce, and there were shortages of supplies, like the sprayer for the FluMist version.

The H1N1 vaccine is being produced in a sprawling, $250 million facility in Swiftwater, Pa. Like other vaccines, the H1N1 virus is grown in chicken eggs, in an updated version of a process that has been around since World War II.

"Viruses are unique in that they require a living host to propagate. And the egg provides essentially a small, self-contained, sterile factory for the production of the vaccine," Sam Lee, director of manufacturing technology at French drug company Sanofi Pasteur, explained.

The plant has to be as clean as a hospital operating room. Pelley and the "60 Minutes" team put on clean suits and hairnets and passed through airlocks to reach the production line.

Five companies are making vaccine, but this is the only one in America.

"I see all these needles going into the top of the egg. Is that the virus going into the egg itself?" Pelley asked, observing the production process.

"There's the needle that comes down," Lee said. "The virus is then introduced directly to the egg. The eggs exit the machine. And are loaded onto carts. These carts are then wheeled into incubators, where they're environmentally controlled for temperature and humidity."

The virus grows in the eggs; later it is killed and refined into vaccine. The process takes three months. Most of that is testing for safety and sterility. Sanofi Pasteur has a federal contract to make 75 million doses. They will go through millions of eggs.

Asked if the farms producing the eggs are near the vaccine plant, Lee told Pelley, "Because of security reasons, I'm not at liberty to share specific, exact locations."

"These are secret egg farms?" Pelley asked.

"We don't want to reveal the location for security reasons," Lee said.

The farms in undisclosed locations are considered so important to national security, that among the first to get the vaccine were the egg farmers themselves. The egg program is one part of a $7 billion project launched five years ago by the Bush administration to build factories and infrastructure to make vaccine in case of a pandemic.

The official responsible for the vaccine program is Kathleen Sebelius, secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services.

At her national operations center, Secretary Sebelius was looking at figures for last week that were not encouraging. "We have just under 100 deaths, at this point, that have been confirmed H1N1 deaths. And they're on the rise," she said.

She told Pelley hospitalizations are on the rise and the epidemic is growing.

Sebelius told "60 Minutes" she learned there was trouble three weeks ago when the new virus wasn't growing inside the eggs as fast as seasonal flu virus does. Some companies were getting half their usual yield.

To learn more and watch the "60 Minutes" story for yourself, check out the following link:

"An Inside Look At H1N1 Vaccine Production"

After seeing this story, I started developing a conspiracy theory that I feel isn't too outlandish. Could it be possible that this H1N1 virus is not a flu at all but some type of biological warfare that has been launched against our nation?

Granted, it started in Mexico. But what better way to slowly implement your biological warfare against the United States by infecting people illegally entering and exiting the United States on a regular basis by the hundreds of thousands? That's a whole separate issue our people and government have been dealing with. Is that too far fetched to consider?

And going even further, could it be possible that (staying on the theme of this being a deliberate biological attack) this H1N1 virus was purposely created and launched by OUR government to test the waters on it's ability? But now that it has spread far quicker than expected, and our country has a real problem on it's hands, apparently.

Read this comment from the 60 Minutes story again:

"Experts agree the government decoded the virus to prepare a vaccine in record time, a real achievement."

Really? Could this fact be because the government caused this whole damn mess to begin with? Maybe? Possibly? HMMMMMMMM?

I realize that this French drug company has a exclusive contract to produce this vaccine for the H1N1 virus. But if this is such a PANDEMIC, then why the hell aren't there a few other companies being allowed to make the vaccination? Does anyone else find this odd?

Yes, there are five places making the vaccine. But only one in the United States. Why? All this money being dumped into this pandemic by our government to rely on one place to inject eggs for the vaccine? HELLO?

I don't buy it. I truly believe there is something far more seedy and dark about this whole thing. I guess since SARS didn't take off the way some drug companies had hoped, they had to come up with a new sickness to launch against the human race.

Go ahead, call me crazy. But give it some thought and think outside the normal realm.

And remember, the next egg you eat isn't an egg. It's hope. Do I need to start a cause where we all join together and turn over our eggs to local food banks in an effort to assist in helping the French drug company make more vaccines?

I think that's a fine idea. We need to rise up and rally together! We need to form secret ninja squads and sneak into farms across this great land and steal eggs! We need to laugh in the face of Easter and turn our eggs over to the government.

We need to start some domestic terrorism and strike against those who cook, fry and boil eggs! YOU WILL NOT STEAL OUR FUTURE! YOU WILL NOT EAT OUR HOPE! WE WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN AND TAKE YOUR EGGS!

DOWN WITH IHOP!

DOWN WITH DENNY'S!

DOWN WITH VILLAGE INN!

The next person you see eating eggs or some form of egg product, slap them in the face. Let them know that for every egg they consume, a baby angel (and chicken) DIES!

I will not rest until all eggs are safely collected and injected for H1N1 vaccine production! Any one who defies me and mocks my cause will wind up with egg on their face... errrr... wait, well... you know what I mean.

If 2012 is real, then this is where it starts... H1N1.


-Mike The Janitor
©2009
Millenoma Publishing