I'm not sure when exactly I started watching "Sex And The City" reruns. But every time I watch an episode, I think of my friend Malayna Kerton in Reno, Nevada.
One time I was at Malayna's house where she was having a little get together. As the party was winding down, she invited me and my friend Nick Danger to hang out and watch a couple of episodes.
I remember thinking at the time "OH NO! Chic programming. ACK!"
I seem to recall that she was really excited that some of the seasons had come out on DVD and she was really happy to have them in her collection. It's like me and my addiction to "South Park".
But I also remember laughing at the couple of episodes we all watched together. That's what I think about every time I watch "Sex And The City" today. I like thinking about that time.
The show is entertaining. But it is also frustrating. It's one of those few shows where I can laugh and yell at my TV in the same breath. And I cannot stand Sarah Jessica Parker. I don't know if it's HER or her LEAD CHARACTER on the show I can't stand.
I was surprised that she smokes A LOT on the show. Yuck. How very unbecoming. And she is such a goddamn TWIT! What woman acts like this? Wait... hold on. I laugh at my own question because I've dated women like her "Carrie" character.
That's right, I know all the names of the people on the show. Call me a fag but I don't care. Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte.
What's frustrating is how slutty some of these women are. Carrie especially. Now, Samantha is a big ol' whore and proud of it. I don't mind her character because she makes no reservations about enjoying sex and being slutty every now and then.
Carrie, on the other hand, is just like Samantha but every time she opens her legs to a man, she has to analyze every aspect of of what this guy means to her and blah, blah, blah.
That's what makes this show great. This is exactly how men and women interact with one another. Sometimes I think it goes way off base. But most of the time, it's pretty dead on. I guess that's why I yell at the television.
For instance, Carrie's relationship with this guy, Mr. Big. What the hell is this guy's real name? Does anyone know? The problem with the reruns played here on channel 24 is the fact that they're played out of sequence. And they play two episodes back to back.
This sucks because I could be watching an episode from the fourth season followed up by an episode from the first season. You can tell you're watching the first season when Carrie talks to the camera.
I've also noticed that in just about every episode, Sarah Jessica Parker's nipples are always hard. This was hot the first couple of shows I watched but now it's an annoying distraction. Put some Band-Aids on those fucking things!
Since I'm carrying on about nothing here, let me tell you my favorite character on the show. You ready?
You might automatically assuming it would be Miranda because she has red hair. Since we all know of my love for redheads, that would be a good assumption. However, you'd be incorrect.
My favorite character is Charlotte.
Charlotte, and the actress who plays her Kristin Davis, are incredibly sexy to me. I'm in love with Kristin Davis. Seriously. She is so very lovely and her character on the show seems to be the only sensible one in this band of female misfits.
I can't stand Miranda. And I find the actress that plays her, Cynthia Nixon, to not be very attractive.
what the hell am I doing? Not only am I admitting to watching Sex And The City, I'm taking time to dissect and review it. Why the hell are my balls?
I'd talk about my love for the "Gilmore Girls", too, but who really cares. Besides, the show is gone forever now as the last episode was the past Tuesday. I got a little choked up knowing I won't have mindless fun with Rory, Lorelai, Lane, Luke, Logan, Richard, Emily, Paris, Sookie, Taylor, Kirk, Miss Patty, April, Michel, Chris and the entire town of Stars Hollow on Tuesday nights.
*sigh*
I have to get cable so I can start watching more manly shows. I think some of these programs are turning me into a pussy. Who else can rattle off characters from the Gilmore Girls? Anyone? Anyone?
I think I'm the only person who... hold up... only MAN who admits to watching this show. So sue me. No, it wasn't the greatest thing on television that you could watch. But it is much better than some of the other mindless shit that is on the tube out there.
I also watched the final few episodes of "7th Heaven". That was ultra gay.
Well, I'm going to go find my balls and have them reattached.
I hope that gets done before "Sex And The City" comes on at 6.
-Mike The Janitor
©2007
Millenoma Publishing
5.18.2007
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