"CAYG"

Within the confines of the Wal*Mart Distribution Center where I work (which I will now refer to ONLY as the "Mothership") are giant yellow banners with black words on them that say "CAYG".

Up until recently, I often wondered what the hell that meant. Was it some sort of secret code for the area you were in or an acronym for something or a subliminal message of some sort?

It never bothered me THAT much to ask until a couple of weeks ago I was able to put two and two together... which equaled a four letter word the spelled "CAYG".

You're so dying from the suspense to find out what that means, huh? Perhaps you already know.

"CAYG" means:

CLEAN

AS

YOU

GO

That's it. Clean As You Go. Meaning, clean up after yourself. And I must admit that this keeps us running a very clean warehouse. I remember thinking how clean it was when I took my first tour before I was hired.

I've been in and worked for a couple of warehouses in my time where there was SHIT everywhere. But not at the ol' Mothership. No sir. Thanks to "CAYG", we can all sleep easier at night knowing our warehouse is in tip top shape.

Whatever.

Actually, the reason I bring up "CAYG" is because it always make me laugh. It still does. CAYG looks and sounds like the way someone with a heavy Boston accent would say the word "cock".

"Fuck you. Suck my CAYG!"

Any of you that have heard or know people from Boston (or even other areas with thick accents) can laugh at this because it's so true.

So every time I see the "CAYG" banners, I giggle and think "COCK".

You know something? I wish my Starbucks would quit rearranging their goddamn furniture in here.

Sorry, random thought.

Anyway, yesterday while I was slaving away, I was able to work alongside one of the more crazy personalities on our crew. His name is Jason.

Jason is a funny guy. This past Saturday we had a General Meeting at the Mothership (this is where everyone gets together in one meeting place for pats on the back and company updates and to be collectively yelled at for fuck up's).

What's great about the General Meetings on the Mothership is the fact they have an almost concert like stage dedicated to them. They have HUGE speakers that hang from the ceiling of the Mothership concert stage and wireless mics and the whole shebang!

I'm sure that somewhere they even have a drum kit, synthesizers, an electric guitar and a bass to jam on when things are going really good on the Mothership. I want to form a Wal*Mart Marching Band. That would be fucking awesome.

Where was I? OH YEAH! JASON! Anyway, Jason jumped up on the Mothership stage this past Saturday and started dancing to the beats coming from the sound system. He got everyone into a frenzy. Not a bad dancer, either.

So, as I was working along with Jason on Monday, I came to find out that he is from Reno, Nevada. This was crazy news to me since I spent a good part of my radio career working in Reno, Nevada (eight years or so).

No shit? Small world. So, as we unloaded freight, we came to know one another. Jason is 32 and went to Reed High School. His family still lives in Reno. And he remembers me from working on the radio there. Well, my radio name, anyway.

He also remembers my close friend Nick Danger and Rob, Arnie & Dawn. He knows of 105.7 KOZZ and Pure Rock 104.5. We had a long talk about all kinds of stuff from my radio career to his desire to also want to do radio.

Now he's looking to become an extra in movies here in the area and work towards being an actor. He'd be perfect. The guy is off the hook and very funny. Not to mention outgoing and the like.

As we continued to talk, the funniest thing happened. I looked down at the freight I was unloading on the conveyor belt and saw the company name. Get this, it was Silenco (which manufactures ear plugs and other safety items) and they're based in Sparks, Nevada which is a suburb of Reno.

The world works in mysterious ways.

This is my life and my card is American Express... bwhahahahahahahahaha.

-Mike The Janitor
©2006
Millenoma Publishing